this way lies madness

I did not intend to test at all. I was going to wait until the beta on Tuesday; I figured there was nothing a test could show me that would make me feel better, but a negative test would certainly make me feel worse.

But this morning something came over me. I opened the bathroom cupboard and saw a test left over from one of our IUI fail-fests … and I couldn’t help myself. I figured, I’m 9dp3dt, the trigger should be well away by now, why the hell not?

So I peed on it.

I swear there was a line. I thought maybe I was making it up, but my husband saw it too (with squinty sleepy morning eyes, no less). It was extremely faint, but it was fucking there.

I know it’s really too early, I know it’s probably the trigger, I know I’m supposed to wait for Tuesday like a good girl …

But I’ve never seen that before. That has to mean something, right?

I’m going to test again tomorrow and hopefully we will see whether or not we were both just wishing that faint breath of a line into existence.


12 responses to “this way lies madness

  1. It’s not too early. It’s not the trigger. Just saying. Not saying anything more until tomorrow, but you can imagine what my heart is doing.

  2. Fingers crossed & wishing you the best. I’ve been meaning to comment throughout your cycle but hasn’t; I wanted you to know how much your cycle reminded me of the roller coaster cycle we had for our surro cycle. It was awful, and I cried a lot but…it ended up well 🙂 Wishing and hoping the same for you!

  3. FIngers crossed for you! This sounds really promising!

  4. my guess is it is the real thing…speaking from someone who has peed on 6 sticks….my trigger tested out negative on 5dp5dt so approximately 10-12 days after trigger…Anything you seen now is most likely real…hoping for the best news when you have your beta on Tuesday….

  5. I’m trying really hard not to get too excited…..but I’m so excited for you! Fingers crossed for a darker line tomorrow (and letting out a tiny squeal).

    Fuck it. YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY! This is fantastic news!!!

  6. Not too early at all. Holding my neath for you for tomorrow.

    • Neath? Oh breath according to my autocorrect. Very much excited regardless. My fingers can’t keep up with the great thoughts.

  7. 9dp3dt? That’s 12dpo which is when my BFPs have shown up. One was chemicalish, one was my son. Its not the trigger!!!!!

  8. That aint no trigger and you know it.

  9. Trigger should be gone by 10 DPO regardless. So I’m excited for you!

    Can’t wait to hear about tomorrow’s test.

  10. Omg!!! I sooooo know those faint lines, and there’s a difference between the lines only YOU see and the ones you AND your husband see. Good luck!!! I’m rooting for you!!!

  11. I’m reading this in reverse (read Sept. 30th first). So you know no that it ain’t no trigger. You, my friend, are preggers.

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